Welcome

I hope it is easy to find lorib.blog, or lorib434.wordpress.com i have been blogging, more like journaling for years, but not for an audience. I have published on The Mighty, recently started posting on Medium and published my first blog on Psych Central today! Can you tell I am excited 😄 The title there is…

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Ambivalence about alcohol and HAMS

I am in a stage of ambivalence about drinking. I don’t know if I want to be 100% sober, but I don’t want to have the negatives from alcohol. I did a cost benefit analysis, but still am unsure. Health-wise, mental stability-wise, employment-wise I should at least only drink in moderation. The main things I…

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Mingling with the “Normies”

I have few friends. This is not new.  My side of the wedding party was all relatives, whereas my husband had mostly friends.  I have trouble making and keeping friends.  I am pretty high-strung ( anxious) and don’t talk much. And, then I flake because I get stressed or symptomatic and no one understands that.…

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A Doodle of How I Feel

I am not good at drawing, but I doodled a picture of how I feel.  It is me with my hands on my ears with thoughts racing a million miles a minute. Yelling Stop in my head. But, to the world around me, I seem fine.

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How to Talk to a Person: my response to how to talk to people with X disorder

You have seen the articles. How to talk to a schizophrenic or how to deal with someone with borderline personality disorder as examples. I am not saying they do not have useful observations. After all, these are published by practitioners with much experience. Having contracts in a therapy relationship and firm boundaries is normal. Controlling…

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Brain on Fire : a review

I just finished watching a movie on Netflix called Brain on Fire. I am going to post spoilers so if you have not watched it, go, get the book if you can’t get the movie. Don’t forget to come back. I have trouble watching shows. If they don’t hold my attention, I do something else.…

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Weight: you gain some, you lose some

  weight gain and psych meds seem to go hand in hand.  I gained 25 lbs when I started depakote.  I did an Atkins diet and lost the weight but I did not find that sustainable for me.  Zyprexa, I gained 5 lbs typing the  name, works really well at controlling mania for me, but…

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Mental Health Conference

i went to a conference today. There were 32 workshops.. the first i went to was on Borderline Personality Disorder. It was very informative and i learned a lot.  The next was on support groups, that was good. There were a number of organizations represented. the last one i went to was “ask the doctors”…

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You May Not Be a Match

I was removed from the bone marrow registry when I updated my health information. They sent me an email saying they have volunteers and it was a safety issue. I didn’t think about it until someone mentioned they were turned down to donate blood because they have schizophrenia. It is not the medications we take…

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The Abyss

I won’t pretend to know what Nietzsche meant by “the abyss gazes into you”. The quote came to mind as I feel like I am at the edge of an abyss, gazing into the void. I feel empty. I am ashamed of who I am. If people knew who I really am they would turn…

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Hypocrite much?

  I feel like a sham i tell people coping skills, but I have trouble doing them myself. My therapist told me to try mindfulness. I know what it is. I recommend it. But, my mind spins so much,  i can’t be “mindful” i have trouble breathing, cbt is out the window, i can’t seem…

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