Tag Archives: psychiatrist

Where have I been?

alcohol, chronic illness, depression, diabetes, earwax, hearing, hearing aids, insurance, Medication, mental health, mental illness, MeRT, peer support, psychiatrist, schizoaffective, schizophrenia, Stress Reduction, Therapy, TMS, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Image: cartoon of several people sitting in chairs. Group therapy.

I have several chronic conditions: mental health, type 2 diabetes, sleep apnea, hypothyroidism, hypertension. I am on 9 medications. I was wondering if there is any type of holistic treatment that could help, and searched different terms in my insurance directory. I came upon a mental health facility that is holistic and integrative. They have a nutritionist on staff. It wasn’t exactly what I was thinking but it looked helpful.

I saw the psychiatrist and he is a bit different but I like him. He changed my diagnosis from schizoaffective to major depressive disorder and anxiety. He seems sure I was misdiagnosed. He decreased my antipsychotic, I am on a baby dose that is more of an adjunct for depression, so far, so good. I

Image: Stethoscope with words Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation

They do a type of Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation called MeRT. It took a couple of months but my insurance finally approved it. I had an EEG yesterday. They use the EEG to determine how to apply magnetic therapy. I may start as soon as tomorrow morning.

The therapy helps bring your brain waves to calm, alert alpha waves. You can get there through coping tools like mindfulness and meditation but this works much faster. I have had anxiety Al, of my life and it impacts me daily. I am really hoping this will help. I use a lot of stress reduction techniques and have been trying to expose myself to things I fear.

I spent 5 weeks in Partial hospitalization all day M-F. Now I am in intensive outpatient 8:15-11:45 M-F. The next step down is 3 days/week, then I am done but will come in for MeRT. I think the routine and structure help. I am learning a lot. You can’t drink alcohol while during MeRT. It is M-F daily and 36 sessions total.

You come up with a daily schedule but I have trouble sticking with it once I get home. I was supposed to come up with a meal plan but I don’t know how. I eat, mostly low carb, but I don’t really plan my meals. I keep snacks on hand and my husband usually makes dinner.

My fasting glucose does not match my A1C. My A1C is normal. I am trying a continuous glucose monitor. I like it but it show high readings, too. My dr thinks donating blood gives me a false low A1C so I am having another blood test in a few months and not donating. I am thinking of volunteering for the Red Cross at the donor center, but I am having trouble hearing. I am getting the wax cleaned out of my ears soon and try to get on a schedule so my hearing aids can work.

Methylation

alcohol, Ancestry, DNA, inflammation, l methyl folate, Life DNA, methylation, psychiatrist, Sam-e, , , , , , , , , , ,
Methylation risk variant results MTHFR, CBS, COMT, MTR and MTRR

I had a DNA test done through ancestry. I sent the results to Life DNA and got some information. They had an offer on methylation genes so I had that analyzed. Out of 10 genes, 7 had risk variants. The variants are not unusual.

Some of them lead to an increase in homocysteine which when increased can be a heart attack risk.  I  have started taking L Methyl folate to help. Another interferes with vitamin d.  I asked my Dr and she ordered homocysteine and vitamin d blood tests.  I take fish oil + vitamin d but it my not be enough.

Another variant causes reduced COMT enzyme activity.  This can cause psychiatric issues.  I am going to ask my psychiatrist about it.  They recommend Sam-e supplementation.

I watched a video on Hashimotos thyroiditis.  It was about inflammation but you have to pay to get more info.  I have hypothyroid. My Dr did no further testing, just TSH.  I take synthroid and now TSH is normal.

I am trying to find out about inflammation. I know alcohol is inflammatory so that is a good reason to cut that back or out. I think I am going to have an extended alcohol free period soon.

Projects

fermentation, internal family systems, projects, psychiatrist, sleep, Therapy, , , , , ,

I have not been sleeping well.  It has been ongoing, but I think it is getting worse.  I am exhausted but not able to sleep.  I don’t get a lot done during the day because I am so tired.  And, since I am awake I go online, which I am sure does not help.  I start looking at ideas for new projects.  I am fermenting vegetables so now I am thinking of planting a vegetable garden in my backyard. But, I have no idea where to begin.  So, I surf the web looking for information on that, instead of relaxing,

 

My psychiatrist prescribed a medicine, trazodone, for sleep.  It is not helping too much.  I asked if it interacted with supplements, like melatonin, and my dr said it would be okay for me so I am going to take both tonight.

 

I have projects stacking up, but the fermenting is taking off.  My pickles turned out good. I set up a second batch with a different type of cucumber. I know you use pickling cucumbers but I can’t find anything with that name.  I have sauerkraut and kimchi that should be done in a week.  I just set up beets to make kvass.  The kimchi tasted good fresh.  That is a short ferment, 8 days.

Image of fermenting vegetables in jars

I see my new therapist for second appointment tomorrow.  The insurance said pending and I was worried they would deny it, but it was eventually approved.  I don’t really know what to talk about except the lack of sleep. 

 

I have been putting off trying to learn to crochet. I have a kit that has a YouTube video but I don’t get it. I looked at wiki how but it confuses me. I have not put much effort into it. I guess I could bring the Internal Family Systems workbook to therapy. I did not know where to start but maybe she will have suggestions.

Projects

anxiety, caffeine, Calories, diabetes, gratitude, internal family systems, keto, Medication, mental health, motivation, projects, psychiatrist, psychosis, schizoaffective, schizophrenia, sleep, Therapy, Weight loss, writing, , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Image: gratitude journal.
https://linktr.ee/matthiasjbarker?fbclid=PAAabOSCj2THoNkFK8nkKoP0OquO5P7L8HeLBBjQkatc1YYQb1W-ott8E8IfQ

I have a number of projects that I have trouble completing.

I am interested in internal family systems therapy. I have a book and workbook to use on your own but I have trouble getting started. I have an appointment with a new therapist in Jan and hope she can help.

I am in the process of reading Brain Energy about how mental illnesses are metabolic disorders. I skimmed through looking for explicit directions for how to deal with anxiety and schizoaffective disorder. He talks a lot about keto but I like to have targets for macros and he does not get specific or I missed it.

I got an activity journal that looks fun but I have only glanced at it.

My cousin, @AnnSloan, wrote a book called Suffer, that I have on kindle waiting to be read

I have a gratitude journal by @matthiasjbarker (pictured) that I just started today. It has prompts for everyday for 6 weeks. He also has a motivational zoom I signed up for. Maybe I can get some sense of priority with these projects and a timeline.

I started keto last month. I slipped a little eating some more carbs than I should. I have type 2 diabetes and keto really helps me with glucose control. My sugars went higher than normal and I am having trouble getting to a level I would like. I have not lost weight but I lose slowly usually.

I had a scare where my blood pressure was high at a Dr , not PCP. I tested at home and it was high on several days. I contacted PCP and she said to decrease salt and exercise more. Still high. I went for office visit and she read bp manually. It was normal. She thinks for some reason the automatic readers don’t pick it up right on me. I can go for manual checks if I need. I am a little confused about sodium. Usually you increase it with keto but my Dr wants me to stay to below around 2 g. I had been drinking bullion but I stopped. Grateful my BP is normal.

My sleep had not been well. It is improving. I can get 6-7 hours straight, the problem is it is shifted. I don’t fall asleep until about 3 am and am tired during the day. I cut back on caffeine and my psychiatrist reduced my medication. It is easier to stay asleep with the cooler weather.

Update

CBT, Coping skills, depression, distorted thinking, feelings, insurance, job, Medication, mental health, peer support, psychiatrist, psychosis, Therapy, work, , , , , , , , , ,
Image: Yellow smiley face

My therapist was able to fit me in with a phone appointment on my lunch break Monday. He validated my feelings which helped a lot. Then, he gave me cognitive behavioral therapy homework to find evidence about being worthless, a failure, etc. There is no deadline. I don’t have a scheduled appointment. I will let him know if I need an appointment. He is going to retire soon.

Then, I talked to the assistant to my boss, I don’t know her title, and told her how I have been feeling. She said she has had no complaints from anyone about me. That helped, too. I made sure to document my encounters this week and this month already looks better.

I have a LinkedIn friend, I don’t know if we have met ever, who volunteers in my field. She mentioned she was looking for work. I told her we had an opening, part time and how to apply. She jumped on it and got the job. I think today is her first day. I hope it goes well for her.

I saw my new psychiatrist. He works in the same office as my last one, but he is covered by my insurance. I don’t know what to think of him. He barely spoke to me, just checked boxes while I talked which was off putting. He took a personal call. I am maxed out on the meds I take and he thinks my antipsychotic is too high, so he decreased it and told me how to taper down. No one has wanted to change my meds because they are working. He does not want to see me for 3 months.

I am a little worried I will destabilize in that time. When I made the appointment for August, I asked if they can switch me back to the other doctor when they get the insurance worked out. They put me on a list.

Sad

Coping skills, depression, Dog, feelings, help, Hope, mental health, mental illness, psychiatrist, Therapy, , , , , , , ,

What do you do when all your coping skills only help a little?

Image view of blue sky from hole in ground

I am in a pit. I know it will pass, but it feels agonizing. My dog and husband try to comfort me, it helps some. I had thoughts of not existing but I have decided against that. I am here to stay, even if I am miserable. I want to quit things that cause me stress. My husband wants me to wait a month to make Important decisions.

I am not sure what I would do with more free time. My therapist moved my appointments further and further out because I was doing well and had trouble coming up with things to talk about. So, he moved me to “as needed”. Now, I need it but I have to wait for a time he can fit me in. I see my third psychiatrist this year next week. My insurance has been denying claims.

If you have any tips on how to ride this out please comment

Therapy PRN?

chronic illness, coconut milk yogurt, insurance, mental health, mental illness, peer support, psychiatrist, schizoaffective, schizophrenia, support, support groups, Therapy, Weight loss, weight Watchers, , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Image: dinosandcomics cartoon I hate leaving the house, why are you here then, well…, I have to have something to talk to my therapist about

I started seeing a new therapist when my insurance changed in January.  He started spacing our sessions further apart because I am doing well and run out of things to say.  Last month he told me he thinks I just need to see him, as needed, and to contact him if I need an appointment.

I don’t know what to think.  I am happy I am doing well but did not know I could finish, with a chronic mental health condition.  I do like checking in with someone but I have a psychiatrist and support group and people around me.

When I ask people about it they think I am unhappy and tell me to speak up, but that is not the issue.  I am unsure how I feel.  I am getting used to the idea now.

 

I also changed psychiatrist with the insurance change. But, I am having more insurance issues. He is part of a medical group that is covered but they are not recognizing him in their system. They covered the first appointment but denied the second. I filed a grievance and the psychiatrist office says it will be taken care of.  It still makes me nervous.

 

Work is going fine. I work 2 days and they hired someone to work the other 3.  I was wondering what he was doing. Work would be piled up for me when I came in.  I just found out he has not been working there for over a month  I feel silly for not knowing, but no one told me.

 

Weight watchers is going fine.  I had a birthday and celebrated with some desserts.  My weight has been going up and down but at least it I have not be gained.  I am getting back at it. I got a recipe book when I signed up and have made a few recipes.  I made slow cooked oats with fruit and a hash brown and egg meal.  I have coconut milk yogurt cooking overnight.  I plugged in a blueberry muffin recipe and it is 6 pts which is okay for a treat but I have to limit to one.

 

 

New Year, New Docs and Parenting Woes

coronavirus, covid, isolation, mandala, Medication, mental health, mental illness, motherhood, parenting, psychiatrist, schizoaffective, schizophrenia, stay at home, support groups, Therapy, ukraine, , , , , , , , , , ,
Image man lying down on therapist couch

My health insurance changed in January. My primary care is the same, but I had to get a new therapist in January. I was approved continuation of care with my psychiatrist, but that fell throug, so I had to find a new psychiatrist, too.

I saw the new psychiatrist on Thursday. Fortunately, he did not want to change my medications. I have been on this combo for years. A friend had recommended a different doctor in the practice but he was booked up so they assigned me to this one. I googled and found him but did not get much information. He seems nice. He ordered refills. Our next appointment is over the phone next month.

I like my new therapist. He makes me think. I asked him what he meant by that article on brain hemispheres and he said just that you can change your thinking at any age.

My daughter is 23 and lives with us. She graduated college last year and plans to get her teaching credential. But, she has not applied, yet. She is afraid to learn to drive and is afraid of Covid. She has a job at the library. We drive her back and forth, which is okay. She just goes to work and home and spends a lot of time in her room.

My therapist suggested we are enabling her to avoid self awareness, and how satisfying is her life if she is isolating? Another thing that is making me wonder. I don’t go out much myself and I feel content. It is not out of fear, I am just fine at home. I mentioned her at a support group and they said we are enabling by driving her and that she may stay home until in her 30s. I don’t know what to think. She seems fine, rarely complains. We did not get along for years and we are in an okay place now.

I don’t know what we should be doing, if anything.

I have joined an art journaling group. It meets once a month. The teacher is a therapist, but it is not therapy. She just charges a donation. She brings up a subject for inspiration. This week she wanted us to bring light to Ukraine. We worked with mandalas which is a circle. I like the way mine turned out. I am not artistic but it is still enjoyable.

Image: blue and yellow circles with yellow heart and sunflower in center. Words: hope, support, power of love

I also joined an online journaling group. It disappeared and I thought they weren’t going to have it anymore, but it is back at a different time. It is enjoyable, too.