I feel like a sham
i tell people coping skills, but I have trouble doing them myself. My therapist told me to try mindfulness. I know what it is. I recommend it. But, my mind spins so much, i can’t be “mindful”
i have trouble breathing, cbt is out the window, i can’t seem to act as if, if as if is that things don’t suck.
my life is fine, i am fixated on the past. And, that i can’t change it.
and of course, i suck, i suck, i suck!
i slipped and drank, too, which i feel bad about, but if it is drinking or suicide, i don’t think it will hurt.
i am safe. I am afraid i would mess up, as usual, and make my life worse.
i can’t be sick. It is not a good time. It is a very bad time.